Complications

          

These pastries are teasing me! They're on the no-no list :P

          It is a beautiful, rainy morning as I sit at a table in the noisy Starbucks near my school. I just dropped Jason off at work (somehow he got me to wake up at 6:30), and now I have about an hour until my speech class begins. I have to admit that I wasn't in the mood to write today, but somehow, if you sit in a coffee shop for more than ten minutes, the writing bug will catch you no matter what! 

          I am supposed to begin my bc in the next couple days for IVF, but I'm really worried about everything being pushed back yet again because of a complication that has arisen. Yesterday I got an ultrasound done, and they found a pretty big cyst, which is usually not something that doctors want to deal with when beginning IVF. It makes sense, because it could be harder to get pregnant with one, but it's still a giant bummer! My hope is that it will get out of my system naturally before I go in for my second ultrasound to start meds. If it doesn't, we will have to wait to begin until it dissolves, which could take up to three months. 

A reminder of the light at the end of the tunnel

          We have been having to push back IVF for various reasons for over a year now, so it's safe to say that I NEED a miracle this month. I believe that there is a Creator who is more than able to go above medicine and logic and heal us. I'm clinging to that hope this month. I've spent more time with God than ever before in my life, so I owe my future baby for that irreplaceable relationship he or she has already helped form. 

          As I've mentioned, I've already dedicated our baby to God, even before they are born. This is essential because as of now, they are with Him, not me. He is the only one taking care of them, and He is the one who has the decision of when they join Jason and I here. The only thing that really gives me comfort is the fact that right now, they are being taken perfect care of. I have 100% faith that they will be here soon enough.. So, it's just a continued waiting game for now. It's crazy how consuming this has become! I'm thankful for all the people who have listened, and who have chosen to understand this journey even though they don't have to. I am blessed through it all!